Who is Going to SAVE YOU? The Courage to Choose Yourself!
- CoachQueenieB
- Jun 25
- 2 min read
By Renia Bigham (Coach Queenie B), with Dr. Pat Baccili
There’s a question that can shake you awake if you’re willing to really sit with it: Who is going to save you?
This episode hit deeply for me—because I’ve lived that question. I know what it’s like to look outside of myself for answers, for rescue, for relief. For a long time, I believed something—or someone—else would come along and pull me out of the hard places. Maybe it was people. Maybe it was belief systems. Maybe it was the hope that something external would finally make me feel whole.
But the truth I had to face was this: no one was coming to save me in the way I thought.
And that wasn’t a loss—it was a turning point.
What I’ve come to understand, and what Dr. Pat and I explored so honestly, is that everything around us—people, faith, tools, support systems—are not here to save us. They are here to support us as we learn to save ourselves.
That begins with one of the hardest, most courageous journeys we will ever take: learning who we truly are.
Most of us were raised being told who to be, how to act, what’s right, what’s wrong. Somewhere along the way, we lost connection with our own inner voice. And without that connection, we don’t know what we need—so we don’t know how to ask for it.
And asking… that’s where so many of us struggle.
We’ve been conditioned to believe asking for help is weakness. That we should be able to do it all on our own. But the truth is, asking for help is one of the strongest things you can do.
I had a moment recently where I was in a situation that felt unsafe—physically and emotionally. I didn’t know how it would unfold, and I knew I couldn’t navigate it alone. Every part of me wanted to figure it out myself, to stay in control. But instead, I chose courage. I asked for help.
And then came the second, often harder step: I accepted it.
That moment changed everything. Not because someone else “rescued” me—but because I allowed myself to be supported. I took responsibility for my safety, my needs, my life. And in doing so, I didn’t just protect myself—I was able to show up for others depending on me, too.
Dr. Pat shared something powerful as well—her own journey of recovery and the realization that transformation is never a solo act. No matter how strong we are, we are not meant to do life alone.
Even the greatest spiritual teachers didn’t walk alone. They asked. They received. They leaned into community.
So why don’t we?
If there’s one invitation I want to leave you with, it’s this:Start getting honest about where you’re waiting to be saved.
Then take one step inward.
Learn who you are.Get clear on what you need.And have the courage to ask for it—and receive it.
Because your power isn’t in being rescued.
It’s in waking up and realizing… you’ve had what it takes all along.
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